It is an eerie sort of day, superstitious or not. We're expecting a big winter storm and it's quiet and calm outside. Single flakes fall, the beginning of what we know is coming. Not the amounts that people further north see, but six inches of snow will have us in for the night. I anticipate a warm and quiet evening at home with a cup of cocoa to melt away the day.
I guess I'm uneasy because I'm home alone. The kids off to church (which is also daycare) for their parties today. They didn't want to miss the day, even if I'm home from work. So here I sit, a to do list as long as my arm, fretting that I want my little ducklings home in the nest with me.
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4 hours later...
Something that I don't like about myself is the way I am forever second-guessing myself. Had I kept the children home with me today, I would've felt guilty for the parties and fun they had missed. So they went off to church this morning, excited for the festive day.
Now I sit here, waiting for enough time to have passed to pick them up (our little guy is fast asleep right now, I need to wait a little bit), and I'm getting absolutely nothing done beyond fretting. Why did I send them off this morning. I should've kept them here with me. The snow is getting so deep, the drive to pick them up (which is less than one mile) is going to be tricky.
The lose-lose situations I put myself in so often frustrate me. I'm not sure where I picked up this habit of fretting over decisions I've made, but I do it all the time!
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Final update...
Relief. I decided to have Hubs go and get the kids early, whether or not we had to wake up the little man. So now we are all home. All safe. Sometimes it's best to just fix what I'm fretting over, rather than suffer through. Now they are have a nice post-Valentine party candy binge, watching their new movie, and enjoying a snowy afternoon at home.
So grateful that we are all safe and in for the weekend. The fret is now officially over.
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10 comments:
Our daycare gets cancelled with Lincoln Public, so daddy is home with Alaina. I'm glad I'm only a short distance from home. I can't imagine the anxiety of watching all this snow fall and knowing you have a long drive home.
Thank goodness church is just down the street!
I think it's a female trait: this tendency to mull and stew about the past. It drives me CRAZY! I waste so much energy and time doing this.
Hope you have a nice evening nesting at home.
Oh I know that fretting feeling well and you're right, it's better just to fix what you're fretting about and end the madness!
Happy Valentine's day! and just enjoy the snow while it's still pretty :)
I hope this whole weekend is cozy and nice for you - and I fret when my kids aren't home, too.
I am sometimes prone to similar kinds of frets: sounds like you did the right thing.
I fret so much when something is in the air--a storm brewing, or some unrest out there, and my kids aren't home safe with me.
I'm glad everyone found their way home! Happy weekend...
sometimes we are unsettled for good reasons and paying attention is best. glad that's over now for you
I echo that sentiment...I constantly do the same thing. I can only assume it is a mother thing.
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