Spent the day lugging laundry up and down the stairs (3 flights, what was I thinking when I thought a tri-level house was a good idea?). Then took a considerable amount of time scrubbing our carpets, ridding them of doggy/baby/toddler/adult spots. Also went out for Easter bunny goodies. A very good day in terms of getting stuff done, not much for inspiring a blog post. My thinking was that since I'm on break, I should write a few more posts - beef up the blog. Tonight my brain is mush; I've got nothing.
That made me wonder: who am I writing this for? When I started this in December, I really thought of it as an extension of my own diary; that I would write it for myself. Then I thought it might be a nice journal of our family's comings and goings, something my kids could look at someday like a baby book. Then I started reading other blogs and vice verse and now it seems I'm writing to those who may stumble upon it and read it. I'm writing to an audience. Is that what I wanted? I really like the hobby this has turned in to, like having pen pals from Texas to Canada. I really like that.
At the same time, writing to an audience certainly changes the tone of what I am writing. You see, I'm a people pleaser to a fault. I don't like unpleasant things and try not to speak of them, unless I am putting myself down - then I have no problem. But I don't like to whine, and I won't put down others. So now that I am writing to an audience, venting is certainly tamed down from what it would be in my own diary. Is it as cathartic if I'm editing myself?
I've also given the address to a few friends and also let my mom see it. I don't see why not, I don't write anything that I wouldn't let anyone see. So now it's definitely not a place where I will vent EVERYTHING. I saw one blogger who has a private blog that only she can open. There's an idea, a diary that she keeps right along her blog, that only she can see. I would be too tempted to share it and inevitably would. My life is pretty much an open book.
So what is my point here? I guess just the thoughts I've had on who I'm writing this for and why. It really has changed since I started, for the better, I think...
I'm glad I've met other women. Smart and funny women who bring their own quirkiness to motherhood. I enjoy that so much because I don't really fit in any mold and I appreciate sharing that with others who don't either. Not to mention how funny you all can be. Then there are posts that really get me thinking on topics that I didn't even know I wanted to think about.