I struggle back and forth (with myself) about blogging about my family. It doesn't bother ME, but would it bother them. I obviously don't use my hubby's name, I wanted to keep it anon. since he's more well known in our community. Why it didn't occur to me to protect the identities of myself and my kids, I'm not sure. Or maybe I am.
I don't think about anonymity. I don't crave it, nor do I intentionally seek attention.
When I think about my own childhood, it would be pretty cool to have an online record of my mom's thoughts and feelings. What she went through when she was rearing us. I can hear her now, telling us how dorky she thinks her writing was. She did write in our baby books, but a blog is so much more.
I picture my kids as teenagers, telling me to cut it out. And I would, if they asked. I picture my kids as adults, asking what I was thinking when I dressed them this way or said that about them. I picture them as part of a huge new generation of people whose parents all kept track of the minutiae of their childhoods. Everybody will have a childhood blog. They'll all have their own blogs. Or not.
Either way, I'll keep writing. I enjoy it so much. I see it as a fun way to remember some of the smaller things that go on in our day to day life. A place that stores our small history together. It's safe to me. I like it here.
For now, it will continue.
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This Is Me
- Melanie D.
- A 40-something teacher, mom to two teens, wife to a principal, Nebraska girl for life.
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12 comments:
I love that you share the stories here. The little quips about the things the kids do and say in the car, or at the supper table; those are the things that we miss out on when we don't get to see each other all that often. It helps to not only document for them, but to keep us all a little closer at heart.
Continue on!!!
I have no idea how privacy issues will evolve as my children get older. It will depend not only on how they feel about things but also, as you've suggested here, on how the culture changes to reflect the reality of online identities. I can imagine making a deal that I won't write about THEM on MY blog so long as they don't complain about me on theirs!
When I read blogs I think of the PBS specials I like to watch and how the writing from pioneer women or civil war soldiers or WWII military men and women are what help us understand, in a real way, not a history book way, what was really happening. We will never know what will happen with our writings but we must be true to ourselves and write what we feel. I have a friend that's always saying she has to get her writing sorted and thrown out. I tell her "what would have happened if Matthew's wife had said "get rid of these old papers""? Just a thought about thoughts on paper (blog paper).
we all need to do what we feel is right. and then it all works out!
We just did a major basement clean-out and one of the things I did was to gather all my keepsake stuff and organize it a bit better. High school stuff together, university, all of my Dad's stuff - you get the idea. I came across some of my Mom's letters to her Mom talking about my up-coming birth.
They are cheerful and kind of skim the surface oh how this taste of my Mom then has made me want more, to really know what she was thinking when she wrote them.
If my kids eventually do not my blog published I will take it down, but I will never delete it entirely. If only so I visit it once in a while and try to imagine just what I was thinking.
I try to tread the line carefully--I try not to reveal personal things about my kids that might bother them later on. I did change their names to initials mainly out of feeling an increasing need to protect my son's privacy--and for myself, so I could write more about some issues and not feel uncomfortable.
I don't know when my kids might start to be bothered by the blog. I think as long as I'm always telling MY story and not theirs... it will be ok.
Great, interesting post, Omaha Mama -- I remember when you used to use your first name as your handle!
I'm researching this stuff actually, so intellectually I'm all like, "hm, yes, let us examine this issue in light of prior trends for publicizing private lives" ... but then, as a mom who blogs about her daughter, I'm all, "?????????"
Tough problem. Dunno.
I try not to write things that will eventually embarrass my children - I remember reading with a shock one mother's blog where she wrote about wiping her nine year old's butt. Um, lady? She's not going to appreciate that.
To Beck: I thought I was just getting old.... A co-worker made a scrapbook page for her son when his penis was his "best friend". There are pictures! I thought that was too bazaar- or sick- so glad it's not just me who thinks there is a decency line.
Like Beck said, I try not to embarrass my daughter unless she publicly embarrasses herself and then, well, it's all fair game. If she ever wants me to stop writing about her, I will. As it is, the older she gets, the less I write about her specifically anyway.
I also tend to think that with blogging we've kinda hit a critical mass out here. It would be hard for our kids to feel stigmatized given how many bloggy peers they have. Because I live in a small town, though, I do work hard at the anonymity from a local standpoint.
I know what you mean! Baby books eventually run out of room as they grow older and this is such a great way to be able to look back and things kids did or said or what not...what a great piece of their own history to have for them! :)
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