Thursday, April 3, 2008

Listen to Me

My heart bursts with pride when I look at her.
It's the selfish part of being a parent, yes?

We went for the audiology exam at school today. "Perfect" ears, our district audiologist said. A man I have come to know as he trained me to use the amplification system for one of my students who has a hearing impairment.

As I coach parents through the grieving they endure. As I tell them that their children are beautiful and wonderful and special (something I believe with every fiber of my being), I feel this pride. This embarassingly huge pride. For my own kids.

So I tell my B, "My heart bursts with love for you."
She says, "Me too."
It's the real thing.

Tomorrow is the kindergarten round-up. The Hubs will take her, I will pick her up. Luckily our home, church/daycare, school, and work are all within 15 blocks of each other. We have perfected this working parent dance, it all seems so easy sometimes.

Then I think of the day that the mom of my student got her news. Your son only has one ear. Your perfect baby boy has suffered strokes in utero. He'll need surgery immediately (and will survive 20 more in the next 15 years). The day she was told, "Hearing impaired."

How do I help her to that pride?
When will she see what I do?
I am proud of him. I tell him so.
I hope he will believe me some day.
The way that my B does.


Beck said...

Lovely post.
I remember the mixture of piercing love and terror I felt when The Girl underwent hearing testing. I'm glad your classes have you.

Mimi said...

Oh, this was heartbreaking, OM: I think your sincerity shines through in everything you do. Maybe for me, it's the fact that you want your pride and joy in B to be the same pride that this other mother will have in her boy, that shows me that you don't see these kids as flawed. They are each perfect in our hearts, right?

Midwest Beach Girl said...

OM, you remind me so much of my mama. Unconditional love is rarely seen in its truest form but the two of you demonstrate it perfectly.

Omaha Mama said...

Mimi - that is EXACTLY what I meant. I had it written down just like that - the perfection bit. Then it felt a little too holier than thou and I deleted it. You've hit it perfectly.

I like the pic! The coffee mug in the forefront makes me crave it!

David said...

I suddenly and very unexpectadly lost all of (yes all of) my hearing 7 months ago. I went from a very healthy, careful marathon running, music loving husband and father, to a deaf guy who loves to sign now.
Everyday I thank God that my son is healthy. He is my world and I so understand your post.
Thank you for this.

Jenifer said...

I am just catching up on the last few posts. I agree with Mimi your sincerity is one of your dearest shows.

Aliki2006 said...

This was beautiful--and I agree with the others, the post couldn't have been more sincere. All our kids are perfect--all parts of them.

Mama said...

Philosophical question- What is pride?

American Heritage Dict #1. Feeling pleasurable satisfaction over an act, possession, quality, or relationship by which one measures one's stature or self-worth.

H-m-m?......let me know............

It's way past my bedtime and I'll probably find all kinds or errors in this comment...good night.

nikkis30by30 said...

This post shows one of the many reasons I love you so much. You are so wonderful in all that you do. And I really mean that. I am so happy that God called you to do this wonderful work with these children. They need someone like you to help them learn that they really ARE perfect, and that the world loves them just as much as it loves everyone else. The world is so tough. For them to have you makes it all just a little easier. Thanks for being you. And thanks for being real. LOVE YOU LOTS!!

Michelle said...

You are a wonderful teacher and mother!